Snapshots of what has been a lukewarm year 2022
What you need to know:
- Hardship visited us and made a permanent home inside campus.
- The economy competed with micro-comrades, aka bedbugs, in tormenting us night and day.
- Adulting asserted its presence in full force. Here are the events and strategies that marked this academic calendar
College life is always tough and 2022, the year of the lord, has been no different. Hardship visited us and made a permanent home inside campus. The economy competed with micro-comrades, aka bedbugs, in tormenting us night and day. Adulting asserted its presence in full force. Here are the events and strategies that marked this academic calendar
Kuinama lunch
Hail the holidays for giving our always empty tummies a break. Unforgiving ulcers have been on our case due to irregular uptake of meals. Lunch was a dreadful hour and comrades tactically invented a food formation which involved bending over so that it (lunch time) passes. Failure to keep to this intermittent fasting programme automatically spoiled the razor thin budget. As such, slim was possible and we now take in stride the "Umekonda siku hizi” comments from cousins. They know not the hunger games we played so gracefully.
Merry child making
Baby fever was on an all time high this year. Temperatures got out of hand and the father above was busy bringing down plates to unborn babies. The young fathers to be, however, were only keen on buying skipping ropes. Campus girls were more fruitful than mango season in Machakos. Miraculously, even Purity, the holier than thou girl from praise and worship spotted a baby bump last semester. In our class, a record six girls are heavy with child. Baby showers threatened to overthrow wild bashes. I am already a proud godfather to two bouncing boys.
Fulfilling fuliza
A knight in shining armor fuliza has been. This loan overdraft service patched up our hugely embarrassing cash deficiencies. It reliably had our backs unlike that one uncle who keeps on saying he’ll send something the whole semester but never does. The petition to increase condoms in public places should be replaced with a proposal to increase the fuliza limit, specifically for comrades.
Mathe and Mama Mboga
Better to be full and feature in the book of debts than to be debt free and hungry. This is a mantra I live by, and Mathe and mama Mboga have helped me live by it. The duo epitomised Mother Teresa with their kindness. They understood me better than my caretaker even though I was feeding them the same lie just to have a meal on loan.
Situation-ships
Campus love this year was built on the cement of circumstance. It was founded on need. You do the group assignment task for a girl and before you know it, you are her academics dude. During tests, she relies on your brainy skull after which she massages your big head as payment. My neighbour, Stacy, had planned to host a brother in Christ for one day only as he attended a nearby crusade. Only for this arrangement to end up as a staycation of more than 300 days. Nevertheless, such entanglements enlivened our dating scene.
Cookie craze and various vapes
Wajackoyah the aspiring president brought out so many lovers of the ‘most high’. Fortified cookies did their job, which is to enhance meditation. Who needs yoga when you can have a fortified cookie? At the same time, the cool, sweet smelling vapes became a mainstay in campus parties. I can’t advocate for the vape, however. I think it is simply a high budget, fancy Ujana ni Moshi.
