Good news at last, but it has nothing to do with politics

Is it possible that something good could be about to happen in Britain after months of the coronavirus pandemic, soaring inflation, widespread strikes and convulsions in government?

It is spring, after all, when hearts are generally lifted, in a temperate climate like ours, by the sight of tiny white snowdrops and purple crocuses pushing through the lawns, followed by daffodils, primroses and dog-violets.

It will soon be April, after all, the archetypical spring month, and to quote one nature writer, “Along roadside and river bank, in wood and wetland, in grassland and garden, over bog and mountain, there are signs that nature has emerged from her winter torpor.”

In my own back garden, six large pink blossoms have emerged on a rhododendron bush, setting off its glossy green leaves, with tiny yellow narcissi seeking attention at its foot.

Cautious gardeners will warn against optimism, casting a wary eye at the sky and quoting one of many proverbs and sayings that forecast, or warn against, future weather events.

All British children quickly learn them: “Oak before ash we’re in for a splash, ash before oak we’re in for a soak” ; “Red sky at night, shepherd’s delight, red sky in the morning, sailor’s warning” ; “Clear moon, frost soon,” and so on.

The prophecies don’t always work out, but spring does inevitably follow winter, be it wet, dry, warm or cold, and a good-news item about next month has lightened the national mood.

Mexican wave

A spokesman for the National Trust, which guards our natural heritage, acknowledged that recent cold snaps had delayed the emergence of spring blossoms on hedgerows and trees, but added, “We are still in line for a truly incredible show in April when the delayed blossoms will burst forth across the country, like an amazing Mexican wave, marking the reassuring moment that spring has arrived.”

Good news at last!

East Africans might doubt whether such a show would ever match their jacaranda, bougainvillea and Christ’s thorn, but you can only enjoy what your country’s weather provides.

The pity about the National Trust statement is that it came on the same day that a United Nations panel of scientists meeting in Switzerland warned that climate catastrophe would sweep the world unless swift action was taken to cut carbon emissions.

“Humanity is on thin ice, and that ice is melting fast,” warned UN Secretary-General Antonio Guterres. “Our world needs climate action on all fronts, everything, everywhere, all at once.”

He called on rich countries to stop using coal, oil and gas by 2030 and developing nations by 2040. The target, he said, must be carbon-free electricity generation worldwide.

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Gallantry awards have been announced for ordinary people who tackled a knife-wielding terrorist in London in 2019. The heroes include a convicted murderer.

Usman Khan stabbed two Cambridge University graduates to death at a conference discussing the rehabilitation of offenders, then ran through the street, stabbing wildly at passers-by with two blades.

Darryn Frost used the tusk of a narwhal, an Arctic whale, to fend off Khan, while ex-offender John Crilly wielded a fire extinguisher. He was assisted by Steven Gallant, who had been convicted of murder but since released.

Khan, who wore an imitation explosives belt, ran on to London Bridge where he was shot dead by police.

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It would be rare for the sceptical British public to give our leaders a rousing cheer at any time, but a recent poll has shown that ordinary people are pessimistic about the future as never before, and the government gets the blame.

A survey of 3,000 adults carried out in January showed that there was widespread disdain for politicians, with trust in government at only 27 per cent, its lowest point since 2016.

Some 66 per cent of those questioned said politicians were more likely to lie than other people, 77 per cent that they were making life worse and 80 per cent that they were making the country more divided.

It was not just the ruling administration which came under fire. Sixty one per cent said what Britain needed was “a completely new type of political party to compete with the Conservatives and Labour for power.”

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A Scot, an Irishman and an Englishman were each sentenced to a year in solitary confinement for serious crimes. Each was allowed something that would help them endure their long sentence.

The Scot asked for 500 bottles of whisky, the Irishman was given 2,000 bottles of Guinness and the Englishman ordered several hundred cartons of cigarettes.

When the year was over, the Scot shouted, “I’m free,” then dropped dead from liver failure. The Irishman was dead already, from alcoholic poisoning, but the Englishman emerged looking fine.

Politely approaching the guards, he asked, “Do you happen to have a match on you?”

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