I felt dead: One woman's journey through post-election trauma
In 2013, amidst the chaos of disputed election results, three men violently entered Lila's home and raped her in front of her husband and four children.
What you need to know:
- Lila, a survivor of election-related sexual violence , found healing through a support group after years of isolation and trauma.
- Despite progress in addressing GBV, many survivors of election-related sexual assaults still await justice and reparations.
For nearly six years, Lila* secluded herself in a rented house in Manyatta, a low-income settlement in Kisumu County. She was desperately trying to escape a world that constantly reminded her of a horrific experience she longed to forget.
In 2013, amidst the chaos of disputed election results, three men violently entered Lila's home and raped her in front of her husband and four children. Her husband's attempts to protect her were futile, and the children's piercing wails filled the air.
Stigma
"When they finished, they walked away like they had not done anything wrong," Lila recalls.
"I felt dead. How could they do that to me before my husband and children? I hated myself. I hated my body."
The trauma extended to her marriage. From March 2013 to February 2019, there was no physical intimacy between Lila and her husband.
"He would blame me for allowing myself to be raped," she says, her voice heavy with pain.
Lila desperately needed her husband's support to withstand the stigma from their community.
"On my way to water kiosk, shop or market, I'd hear people say 'look at that woman, she was raped. Such a shame. Is the husband still living with her?'" she remembers.
"I knew the world had ganged up against me. The only place I felt safe was inside my house. I was always in bed sleeping after finishing the domestic chores."
Before the attack, Lila had been recently promoted at a construction company in Kisumu. The rape stripped her of her rights to bodily autonomy and work, both guaranteed by the Kenyan Constitution and Universal Declaration of Human Rights.
In 2019, a fellow rape survivor from the 2007/8 post-election violence formed a support group for women who had experienced similar trauma. Initially, 40 women joined, but the emotional toll was too great for many. Only 10 remained.
This group became Lila's lifeline.
"She counselled me for days before I finally accepted to join the group," Lila says of the founder.
"She also counselled my husband and he changed. Since 2019, I can say he has changed. He doesn't blame me anymore for the rape, and he now treats me better."
The improved relationship at home has aided Lila's healing process. She can now discuss her feelings with her husband without fear and speaks about her experience without breaking down. The group meets weekly to weave mats and make soap, activities Lila finds therapeutic.
GBV module
"Every Friday I go home lighter and much happier. That joy of sharing with your sisters who understand what you're going through is relieving," she explains.
However, justice remains elusive for many survivors of election-related sexual violence in Kenya. More than 3,000 women suffered sexual violence during the 2007/08 post-election chaos, according to the Coalition on Violence against Women. The perpetrators included administrative police, regular police, members of the General Service Unit, and organized gangs.
Jacqueline Mutere, founder of Grace Agenda, an organization advocating for survivors of election-related sexual violence, voiced her frustration at a recent conference in Nairobi.
"It's 15 years now and survivors of sexual violence during the 2007/8 post-poll elections are yet to receive reparations. What happens to these survivors? What happens to the children born out of the rape?" she asked.
While there has been progress in addressing gender-based violence (GBV) in Kenya, including the establishment of a GBV information system and the introduction of a GBV module in the Kenya Demographic and Health Survey, Ms Mutere emphasised that survivors of post-election violence have been overlooked.
"The survivors are dealing with mental damage that cannot be retold yet we are not having these conversations," she said.
"Where is the justice for the survivors," she asked, her words echoing the sentiments of many who continue to suffer in silence.
Lila* is a given name to avoid exposing her to unprecedented stigma.
