The other side of Orie Rogo-Manduli

She comes across as such a complex character, that one is hard-pressed to describe her in just one paragraph.

Watching her on television, she cuts a combative, aggressive and fierce image. There is no doubt that she is a spitfire. She speaks her mind and is not afraid to fight her battles on her own, be they private or public.

Another thing that many will agree on is that she is no shrinking violet – she loves attention, dresses to capture it and will gladly pose for the camera for hours, proudly flaunting what she calls her “African figure”. She is Orie Rogo-Manduli and she is extraordinary.

Fascinated by this woman who has a knack for courting controversy as much as she commands public attention, Saturday decided to spend a day with her, hoping to find out just what makes her tick.

We ended up getting more than we had bargained for – a different side of Orie that the public hardly ever gets to see. It came as no surprise that the outer walls of her colonial-style house are painted a brilliant orange. That is vintage Orie. She does things differently.

Her bedroom, where we do some of the chatting as she spruces herself up for the photo shoot, is filled with rows and rows of shoes, a large wardrobe full of brilliantly coloured African outfits (she makes her own clothes) and a couple of weaved containers holding an assortment of make-up and tons of jewellery.

Going through her photo albums, it is evident that Orie’s sense of style has matured with age, but it is no less flashy, what with her legendary head pieces which have become her trademark.

“I take pride in looking good always. Today’s young women are simply not keen on how they look,” she offers, swiping red lipstick on her generous lips.

She is unpretentious: she shoots straight and tells it as it is. Raised by parents who were both teachers, she is also well-read. She is currently pursuing her Master’s degree in International Development Studies at USIU, Nairobi.

“My parents taught us to believe that we were destined for great things. Being teachers, they understood the importance of education and always encouraged us to work hard, saying this was the only way we could get ahead in life.” She adds, “I have always wanted a good life, therefore I work hard.”

And work hard she does. She owns a wheat and maize farm in Kitale and in between her tight schedule, finds time to distribute health products.

Despite her advancing age, Orie is certainly not about to slow down (she declined to reveal her age).

Two weeks ago, someone else took over the helm of the NGO council, which she had steered for the past four years.

But she is far from idle. She has thrown her weight behind ETAGOA, East Africa, (Enlarge the Tent Evangelical Outreach Association), a Church-based organisation founded in 1984 and which draws members from 39 Africa countries.

Then there are the other NGO’s that she heads. With all these responsibilities, her calendar is already full.
Barely an hour into the interview, two matatu loads of people drive into her compound. They are ETAGOA members, who have come to pay her a courtesy call.

For a while, we are forgotten as she greets each one of them, heartily welcoming them to her home. She later explains that they are shooting a documentary to chronicle the strides that the organisation has made.

We glean another side of Orie. That she can be gracious. She says of Dr George Gitau, the man who succeeded her at the NGO council, “He is a good man, he will succeed, but I think he needs to toughen up a little.”

She should know. To survive what she calls the “murky depths of civil society” one has to develop a thick skin.

With a thoughtful look on her face, she declares that if she succeeded in holding onto the reigns of the NGO council for that long, she can run this country with her eyes closed.

Women hold a special place in her heart. In fact, she was once accused of being a ‘female chauvinist’ for her radical position on women’s rights. But she has a strong motivation for taking women’s side, having grown up seeing women take whatever life dished out since they were not economically empowered.

“I grew up in Kaloleni in Kisumu where girls married very young. Some would be grabbed from school and married off to old men. These girls lived a miserable life.”

She feels that years later, women are yet to become economically empowered.

“Real freedom comes from the pocket. Without a well-lined one, life is difficult.”

Orie who says she is in her mid fifties, has the energy of a 20-year-old. What is the secret? “I got married so young that I never had a chance to be a girl. I jumped from childhood right into womanhood. I am now living the life I was denied all those years ago.”

She describes herself as a dreamer, who tries to turn her dreams into reality.

“My biggest fear in life is to die, yet have no one know that I lived,” she says, adding that she has already told her three daughters that when she does pass on, she wants a celebration and lots of flowers.

Profound statements but contrary to what one may think, she does not take life too seriously. At one point when she overhears her second-born daughter, Allison, complaining that she is having a hectic day,(her office is in the compound), she advises her to “give life a chance.”

Allison later tells us that indeed, her mother loves life and lives it to the full. “Mum never turns down a party and frequently entertains here at home. As much as she works hard, she still makes time to enjoy herself.”

Orie separated from her first husband when her daughters were still very young, taking on the responsibility of raising them on her own. A daunting responsibility which she executed the only way she knows how – with single-minded dedication. Her children think she did a superb job.

Says Allison, “Mum worked hard to ensure that we had the best of everything. But even as she put in extra hours at work and performed odd jobs such as looking after other people’s children and cleaning their houses, she always had time for her children. We never lacked for anything, and she was always there when we needed her.”

But what was it like being raised by a mother like Orie? “Those who do not know her have the misconception that she is a harsh person. When people find out that she is my mother, they assume I must have had a rough childhood. It is quite the opposite.”

Allison says that her mother never raised a hand on them. “Mum never beat us…her voice was enough to tame us into obedience,” she quips; referring to her mother’s commanding voice.

“She is a very understanding, approachable person, the best mother a teenager would hope to have.” But she was also firm, ensuring that her children grew up to be responsible and respectful of other people.

“We had everything we wanted, but she did not spoil us. She had her boundaries and we knew better than to cross them. ”

When she allowed them a night out, for instance, she always reminded them to be considerate of the driver who drove them to the venue. This meant that they had to be back home by a certain time so that he could have sufficient rest.

When they were at that impressionable age, instead of forbidding them from drinking alcohol, she let them taste it, telling them that she did not want them to do it behind her back. She is that practical.

Allison keeps a framed photograph of her mother on her desk, a gesture that says a lot concerning what she thinks about the woman who raised her.

“One of the things that make us proud is the fact that when she speaks, she knows what she is talking about. Mum is intelligent.”
Her children have also resigned themselves to sharing their mother with everyone else.

Orie and her trademark headgear, attracts attention wherever she goes, a fact that is evident as we head to town in her car after the interview. While stuck in traffic, a group of school children spot her through the window and wave excitedly – she waves back.

A policeman, who is controlling traffic, she seems to know him because she calls him “Kosgey”, smiles and motions her driver to proceed.

Once we get to the city centre, a man about to cross the road spots her. He stops and waves furiously. Orie rolls down her window and says hello to the star struck man.

Allison says that her mother never tires of the attention she gets.

“Mum is a people person. She talks to everyone and anyone. The person she talks to is the most important person to her at that moment and she will give him or her undivided attention.”

Though she has often said that getting married at a young age was a mistake, Orie would ensure that each time her children came home for the school holidays, they would visit their father.

“Whenever we protested, she reminded us that even though they were no longer together and he played no role in our lives, he was still our father and we owed him respect,” recalls Allison, who says that they never heard their mother say a disparaging word about her first husband.

Though not keen on talking about what led to the break-up of her first marriage, Orie says that she never thought she would find love once she separated from the father of her three children.

“I never thought I would find a man I could be happy with and often told my late mother that. But she kept reminding me that good men do exist and that a good one would find me.”

True to her mother’s words, she did find her knight in shining armour, in Misheck Norman Manduli, a widower and descendant of one of Zambia’s royal families, in 1981.

By this time, she had all but given up on men, immersing herself in work and taking care of her children. She had traveled to Lusaka, Zambia, to do a story for the BBC.

“His daughters are actually the ones who brought us together,” she smiles.

Hers reads like a fairy tale romance. Not wanting to leave her young children behind, she had taken them along to Zambia with her, bringing a nanny along to keep an eye on them while she worked.

Her late second husband’s two children spotted her and her daughters at Lusaka’s Hotel Intercontinental where they were staying. Besotted by her young daughters, the older girls, who frequented the hotel convinced their father to accompany them so that he could see the three “lovely girls and their mother who looked like a film star”.

“He fell dangerously in love when he saw me,” she declares with flourish.

It is this man who managed to conquer a headstrong Orie, going on to marry her. Together, they got a son, Katesha who the family fondly refer to as Kats. Her husband passed away in 2003.

“He was a good man, my soulmate,” she says, her eyes clouding for a moment.

She regains her composure, “The Zambians were crazy about me. I could cook, I could dress, and I could entertain,” she says of her in-laws.

During her spare time, she reads biographies and autobiographies, explaining that she likes reading about real people. She is also a fan of cartoons and could spend hours watching one after another.

Occasionally, she watches movies. She is also a good cook and enjoys nothing better than a meal of Ugali and fish.

So, has she accomplished everything she ever wanted?

“I would like to be the first African to go to space, but even if I do not get to do it, at least I have enjoyed my life and done it my way.”

She certainly has.