This is why we chose to limit social media use

Do you ever feel guilty for reaching for your phone first thing every morning, not to check emails or news updates, but to doomscroll through Instagram, TikTok or Threads for hours on end? I thought I knew myself pretty well until I scrolled through my phone's analytics last week – a quest that felt like snooping on myself – and was confronted by a difficult truth: I often spend up to 10 hours every day on my phone! It's little wonder, then, that social media detox is now a thing among Gen Zs.

As the digital space continues growing, more and more young people are feeling the need to take a break from the fast-paced online world.

Typically, detoxes become necessary when an individual becomes addicted to something and is unable to stop, in this case, social media. However, detoxes can also be employed as a strategy to set boundaries and limit usage.

Social media can be addictive. When people like, comment, and share compliments on our posts, our brains produce dopamine which give us a feeling of joy and gratification. Over time, a social media user may begin relying on social media to feel happy, and to seek affirmation or approval from others.

Also read: How getting hooked to social media ruins your mental health

It is wiser to take a break from social media before you develop this reliance, not after. This is especially important for teenagers, as researchers have found that extensive social media usage exposes one to a host of mental health issues such as social anxiety, social isolation and feelings of loneliness.

Recent data released by McKinsey Health Institute showed that one in four Gen Zs – those born in the late 1990s and early 2000s – connect spending a lot of time on these platforms with poorer mental health.

Additionally, a survey by Reuters Institute revealed that Kenya is the global leader in TikTok usage, with 54 per cent of users engaging in the platform for various purposes and 29 per cent relying on it for news consumption.

We spoke to four Gen Zs to understand why they are 'breaking up' with social media.

Morgan Wanyoyi, 21
Student, Rongo University

In the year 2020, as the Covid-19 pandemic raged, I was in Form Four and studying hard. To support me, my parents gave me a phone with an educational app installed. Additionally, our school had a WhatsApp group where teachers shared study material and notes.

Also read: Experts: Too much online time affects behaviour of teens

Initially, this digital setup was quite beneficial. However, as time went by, I succumbed to peer pressure and joined various social media platforms because all my friends were there. I kept asking myself, “Why can’t I have as much fun as my class mates who are on social media?” My life was seemed so boring.

Regrettably, during this period, I wasn't aware that I could use social media without sharing my contact or personal information with the public. I didn’t even know how to take a selfie until my friend showed me!

One day, someone reached out to me via WhatsApp. I didn’t know what they wanted but they were quite friendly in the chats. After some time, this person became my friend.

Little did I know that he harbored ill intentions. He began sending me explicit photos and videos, which shocked and deeply disturbed me. I once left my phone unattended, and my younger sister took it. Like any curious child, she went to the photo gallery where she found despicable content.

Unfortunately, my parents were at home and when I returned, I faced a mixture of embarrassment, frustration, and disappointment. I was accused of prioritising useless videos instead of focusing on my studies. I couldn’t defend myself. 
My mother, who had once been so close with me, became distant due to the disappointment.

The humiliation I felt led me to a weird decision. I resolved to stop using phones for two months and focus solely on my studies. Thankfully, with time, my mother forgave me.

Viola Rotich,
Digital marketing strategist

I am typically not one to openly express my thoughts and emotions on social media. I prefer to keep a low profile and observe my surroundings. However, I once found myself entangled in a peculiar and distressing situation on social media.

It all began when I stumbled upon a woman on Twitter who I had never met before. From the very beginning, I realised she liked comparing herself to others, and unfortunately, I became the target of her misplaced jealousy and subsequent hostility.

Also read: Social media comes with so much pressure in life, ignore

Prior to this encounter, I had been leading a relatively ordinary life, using social media as a platform to share my achievements and joys with friends and colleagues. Little did I know that this young woman had been enviously following my every post. 

She was severely bothered by my apparent success since she struggled to find satisfaction in her own life, so she chose to express her frustrations by lashing out at me. She hurled hurtful accusations my way, and even falsely claimed that I was HIV positive.

In an attempt to reason with her and stop her from spreading more falsehoods, I engaged her in a conversation and tried to explain my truth. However, she continued to demean and belittle me whenever I shared a positive moment or celebrated an accomplishment.

This barrage of insults gradually wore me down and took a toll on my mental well-being. I developed anxiety and was constantly on edge, anticipating her next attack. Despite the unwavering support and encouragement I received from friends and other social media users who recognised the woman's misbehaviour, her negativity greatly impacted my emotional state.

In 2022, I reached breaking point and seriously contemplated quitting Twitter. I questioned whether the benefits of remaining on the platform really outweighed the emotional anguish I was in. Eventually I made the conscious decision to prioritise self-care and personal growth.

Through this challenging experience, I learnt an invaluable lesson. I am now aware that the digital landscape can be a breeding ground for negativity and hostility. While I will always remember this social media stranger, her vile accusations no longer bog me down or define who I am.

Also read: My wife's phone addiction is killing our great marriage

Just last week, this same woman criticised me for not including her in a job opportunity. She used extremely hurtful and derogatory language. She said, “…that's why you're so skinny, because of your bad intentions. One day, you will be in trouble, and we’ll see if those men you keep chasing will help you.'"

Receiving such a text message from a complete stranger, especially so early in the morning, was quite disconcerting, but it was also a reminder that social media is no longer a safe haven.

Alex Otara, 21
Student at Kenyatta University

Social media has become an integral part of my life. It provides me with an avenue to connect with the world and share my thoughts and experiences. However, as a frequent Twitter user, I once found myself drowning in the platform.

I joined because I was fascinated by the witty exchange of ideas on Twitter, as well as the chance to interact with influencers, experts, and friends from across the world. The brevity and ease of sharing information on Twitter was also a plus, and I made it my go-to source for news and sports updates, memes and politics.

The sense of belonging to a vast online community was so alluring that I would spend hours scrolling through my feed. After almost two years of spending over 10 hours a day online, I realised I had neglected real-life interactions and hobbies. Instead of living in the present, I felt a constant desire to document and share every personal moment. The superficiality of online connections started to overshadow meaningful relationships, and my self-esteem became dependent on the number of likes and comments I received.

The turning point came when I had a candid conversation with a close friend who had left the same platform earlier. She spoke about newfound peace of mind and increased productivity after quitting social media. She inspired me, and I began to ponder on the impact that the platform was having on my mental well-being and general happiness.

Also read: How sad that we’ve become slaves of social media sites

My addition to Twitter had kept me from being fully present in conversations with those close to me. My conversations became overwhelmingly based on what I read there, making me a bore to those who did not relate with the platform. The thoughts and ideas of other users impacted and reinforced my existing beliefs. It was clear that Twitter was no longer adding value to my life, rather, it had become a source of distraction.

I decided to take a temporary break from the platform to gain clarity. Initially, it was challenging to resist the urge to log in and check notifications. FOMO crept in, and I felt disconnected from the virtual world that had become so familiar. I did log in at some point, but something had changed by this time, and the attraction had reduced significantly. I think this was the motivation I needed to finally quit.

I deactivated my account and swore not to log in for the next 30 days. The process felt both liberating and nerve-wracking. I felt a sense of loss. I had accumulated thousands of followers at this point, and I was leaving behind a significant part of my digital identity.

However, the excitement of embracing a life free from the constraints of social media overshadowed any doubts. Days turned into weeks, and I found myself embracing real-life interactions with renewed enthusiasm. I rekindled my passion for hobbies, and spent this time to gain new skills. The absence of constant comparison and the pressure to curate a perfect online persona lifted a weight off my shoulders, and I experienced a new sense of freedom.

Stepping away from Twitter allowed me to regain control over my life. It took time to break free from the virtual chains, but the emotional and psychological benefits were worth every step of the process. I'm not going to lie, the platform undoubtedly offers unique opportunities for information sharing and networking, but it can easily become a double-edged sword.

My departure from Twitter has taught me the importance of striking a balance between my online and offline life, and valuing authentic connections. By leaving the platform, I took a step towards reconnecting with reality, which led to a happier, more fulfilling, and contented life.

After a year-long hiatus from social media, I recently decided to make a comeback, with a specific focus on networking with like-minded individuals in my field of expertise.

Jacinta Museo, 22
Journalism student, Moi University

During my first year in campus, there came a point when I felt like I was losing myself. It felt very much like being addicted to drugs.

Loneliness started to consume me because, naturally, I've never been the type of person who easily makes friends. I was a bit of a loner who retreated to her room after classes and engaged in social media until evening. I even neglected meals because I felt that the connection I had with my phone was enough to sustain me.

Also read: How to overcome internet addiction

At some point, I had a moment of self-reflection and realised that I had lost myself. I was never fully present in any given moment. I couldn't concentrate for more than a minute. It was evident that I was engaging in self-sabotage. In order to break free from this addiction, I decided to quit social media for two months after my exams and instead spent my time reading novels, working out, and spending time with the new friends I made.

This shift in my routine taught me how to better balance my life and escape the addictive behaviour. I made the decision to stop "phone phubbing" – a term used to describe the act of ignoring those around you because you are constantly on your phone. It had become one of my toxic traits. By reducing the time I spent mindlessly scrolling through my phone, I started to realise that there was more to life than what appeared on those screens. It was a key step in regaining control of my happiness and fulfillment.

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