When a woman opts to make the first move

It will probably be subtle and deniable though, because she won’t want to risk being turned down in front of her friends

Everyone agrees that when boy meets girl, he should be the one who makes the first move.

But strangely, that’s not true. It’s actually always the woman who makes the first move. Sometimes subconsciously, sometimes deliberately. But things never go well unless she issues the invitation. Only inexperienced guys or chancers approach a girl without seeing a signal that they’re welcome.

It will probably be subtle and deniable though, because she won’t want to risk being turned down in front of her friends. Most likely she’ll just catch your glance, apparently accidentally, so there’s no embarrassment if you’re not interested or she’s changed her mind.

She’ll hold your glance just long enough to get your attention, then quickly look away. If she’s still keen, she’ll lower her eyelashes and look down. Maybe touch her face or giggle. Then glance back with a shy smile. Women everywhere use these same gestures to say ‘let’s talk’ to a male.

See something like that and you can walk over and start to talk. It almost doesn’t matter what you say, so long as you’re polite and genuinely interested in her. And her body language will quickly tell you if she’s still interested!

You’re doing well if she’s looking at your face while you’re talking. Surreptitiously glancing at your hair, height, build, clothes, shoes, watch, mobile, you name it, as she assesses your status, income and taste. And if she still really likes what she sees? Glance back as you turn away for another round. See her eyes slipping down to your butt, she thinks you’re attractive.

She’ll probably be making little shoulder shrugs, and repeatedly adjusting her clothes. And watch her wrists. Girls keep them turned inward unless they’re with a guy that they fancy. Then magically they turn outwards! Watch for her tossing her head, rubbing the back of her neck, or running her hands through her hair.

She’ll lick her lips, fiddle with her clothes and lean towards you. Her voice will become softer. Her head will get closer to yours. If she’s sitting, she’ll cross her legs or reveal her inner thighs.

You’ll also be sending subconscious signals that say whether you’re as interested as she is, of course.

The first will be an ‘eyebrow flash.’ Your lips will part for a moment and your nostrils flare. You’ll make yourself stand out a little more, maybe adjusting your clothes or clearing a little space around you.

You’ll start messing with your hair, and your muscles will tighten. You’ll be focused on her and checking out her body. Spreading your legs, standing hands on hips or thumbs hooked in your belt. Playing with your clothes, touching your face, getting closer, and ‘guiding’ her by putting your hand on her arm or the small of her back.

A sharp girl often says she’s feeling cold. Slip your jacket over her shoulders. It’s a protective and sexy ‘ownership’ gesture that can only lead one way ...