Fiolina wants me out of her house, but I’m staying put


I did not inform Fiolina about my trip because I wanted to surprise her.

Photo credit: Nation Media Group

What you need to know:

  • I have been so busy that I even forgot about Fiolina, the laugh of my life.
  • Okay, I did no forget her; I just did not find time to visit her.

As you all know, the last few weeks have been busy for me at work. After we managed to get rid of Kuya, I got busy restoring this school to factory settings. I had imagined that it would be an easy job, but the mess that Kuya had left is so deep that it will take at least one term for normalcy to be restored.

From the timetable to teaching standards, student discipline to cleanliness, there is so much that needs to be addressed. In between I have to restore relations with Bensouda.

I have been so busy that I even forgot about Fiolina, the laugh of my life, who, together with Electina and Baby Sospeter, is eating life with a big spoon in Kakamega. Okay, I did no forget her; I just did not find time to visit her.

But this week, an opportunity arose for me to go to Kakamega. You see, there is something that needed to be done at the county education office. Under normal circumstances, Bensouda would have gone. But the fact that she chose to send me is evidence of the trust she has in me to drive this school forward. So I travelled to Kakamega on Thursday afternoon.

I did not inform Fiolina about my trip because I wanted to surprise her. As a good dad,  I went to the market to buy gifts for my family upon arriving in Kakamega. I bought a cheap toy car for Sospeter, a handkerchief for Fiolina and flip-flops for Electina.

I also bought sugar, a loaf of bread and 1kg of matumbo as no real Mwisho wa Lami man enters their house empty handed. I took a boda boda to the house, arriving just before 6pm. I knocked at the gate and although I could hear noises from inside, no one opened. I literally shook the gate, and it was so noisy that they heard, and someone came to open.

Without saying a word, Electina opened the gate. She was wearing a tight vest and a pair of shorts. I reprimanded her and explained that people in my house should dress better. As she opened the door, Fiolina asked. “Who is this who wants to break our gate?”

Expired bread

“And what has brought you here?” She asked when she saw me. “Why didn’t you call to say you were coming?” She was visibly angry. She was wearing a tight jeans and sleeveless blouse. I would be lying to say that I did not like what I saw.

I ignored her and entered the house. Only Sospeter was excited to see me, and he quickly took the toy and started playing with it.

When I gave Electina the flip-flops, she looked at them sneeringly. “Si ungeninunulia croaks?” She asked. I did not know what croaks were. I gave Electina the other shopping. “Throw the bread away, it is expired,” I heard Fiolina tell Electina in the kitchen. 

“Where did you buy this matumbo?” Fiolina asked.

“Why did you want to break the gate when you could have rung the bell?” I did not answer for fear of saying something annoying. 

“Pikia yeye chai,” Fiolina instructed Electina, and then went to the bedroom, locking herself there. I remained in the sitting room with Sospeter, as he played with the toy.  

It was not until very late that day, well past 8.30pm, that I was allowed to enter the bedroom. 

“What brought you to Kakamega?” Fiolina asked.

Doing very well

I explained about my visit to the county education office.

“What is so difficult telling me that you are coming?” She asked.

I wanted to tell her that this was my house and thus did not need to inform her when I was coming; but I remembered that it wasn’t. It was a rental house.

“What if you had found me away in a seminar?” She asked. “Or you want to miss me so you go telling everyone that I don’t sleep here?”

She left early the next morning. “I may or may not come back as we are going far today,” she said.

“Have a safe journey back to Mwisho wa Lami.” 

At 7:30am, Electina walked Sospeter to school. I wondered what a three-year old was going to school to do. You see, I joined school when I was eight-years-old, and you will all agree that I turned out well.

Anyway, I took that opportunity to walk around the house. There was a new TV, a gas cooker, a fridge in the kitchen full of food, a bottle of Jug Daniels, and two bottles of wine, and many other gadgets whose names or functions I did not know.

Fiolina was doing well.

Served ugali sukuma

I left after breakfast, finished my business and returned at 5pm. Electina was there playing with Sospeter. At 7pm, I was served ugali sukuma. When I asked about the matumbo I had bought the previous day, Electina said they had thrown them away.

“We were not sure if it was dog or goat meat.” 

I told her they should have served me if they were afraid of eating the matumbo.

“Even if it was dog meat, at least it was fresh and had been inspected.”

I did not ask why I was being served sukuma yet the fridge was full.

“You are still around?” Fiolina asked when she returned around 8.30pm.

I had heard a vehicle drop her. I asked her how she was able to travel at night with a curfew in place.

“Thanks to my boss, no one can arrest me.”

I asked her about her Saturday plans and she said she would be too busy.

“We have team building tomorrow, and then on Sunday I have driving lessons the whole day.”  

In short, she was telling that I needed to go back to the village as soon as possible.

I will not go; I am staying here until Monday morning. This is my house; I have a right to be here! 


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