Couples who dine together stay together

A family during a Christmas dinner.

Photo credit: Shutterstock

What you need to know:

  • Service is a two-way street built on love and a desire to make your spouse happy.
  • Sharing a good experience brings you closer.
  • Scanning through your day, and looking for the positive vibes can make you realise how lucky you are.

Nothing beats a good family “mbuzi-boozy” get-together that we organise annually. The annual meet-up affords us an opportunity to reconnect with long lost relatives last seen eons ago. The tittle-tattles get the better part of the day. The brouhaha over those famous tales fill the air as we all make merry.

I bound about like a frisky pup all over the place, because, you know that aunty’s gift for Christmas always has that “tiddly” effect on us who partake of it.

I almost disregard the fact that honey booboo had accompanied me to the occasion. But, of course, he is okay in the boys’ club where they catch up on premier league fixtures, as is their all-time groove.

Then dearest mommy comes to burst our bubbles. “What kind of wives did I train you to become? You are here ‘ha-ha tee-hee’ everywhere and your husbands are out there ravenous, with no one to serve them. Go prepare the table, put the delicacies in serving dishes and grab the plates. Don’t forget to wash their hands using warm water.” Mommy laments. But back at home, I’m not used to offering this kind of service. When food is ready, I just scream from the kitchen, “BABE! FOOD IS READY!” I then put my serving in the plate and hit the cosy couch for some Netflix classics.

When food is ready, I just scream from the kitchen, “BABE! FOOD IS READY!

It goes without saying that our generation was raised differently. In bygone days, our parents had to set the table first, and put all cutlery required in an organized pattern. They would warm some water for washing his hands and carry it in a jug on one hand, while holding soap and a hand towel on the other. Once the man’s hands are spick and span, they would proceed to serve the top layer in hotpots, and cover them up to keep the food sizzling hot. They would say a word of gratitude ahead of the feast, and later present a basin of dessert and a jug of drinking water.

But what does it truly mean to “break the bread” together with your spouse? Here are tips:

Service, a two-way street

"Serve" carries the negative connotation that women have and continue to supply invisible and undervalued labour. However, what we do not know is that putting traditional gender roles behind, service is a two-way street built on love and a desire to make your spouse happy. (Or simply, let's be honest, to survive in a sometimes chaotic house, especially when kids come into the picture)

Unwritten rules of marriage

Forget about the nitty-gritties of putting the food in hotpots, washing his hands, feet, bla bla bla. Whatever way you do it, make sure you dine together and get healthy together. Not only food-wise healthy, but also relationship-wise healthy.

Sharing a good experience brings you closer. And, let's be honest for a moment, shall we? Food is always a great experience. You will always be on the same schedule. Eat, have a magical rumpy-pumpy, sleep, repeat –these are basically the unwritten rules of a successful marriage.

Opportunity to practice gratitude.

A friend of mine also mentioned to me the other day that she and her spouse have found an opportunity to practice gratitude. They started a habit of sharing at least one thing they were thankful for before they start eating. It’s amazing how scanning through your day, and looking for the positive vibes can make you realise how lucky you are. So, nowadays when something good happens during my day, I make a special mental note to remember to share it during dinner. It’s a great positive conversation starter as well.

Eating together is fun!

One of life’s greatest pleasures is sharing good food, eating together is fun! Life is too short to miss out on this simple joy and all the good things it can bring to our relationships.

If that inspires you, get a bit creative in the kitchen, include an amazing recipe for ‘’Hubby’s favourite meal’’