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Being desired is the ultimate love potion

Photo credit: Samuel Muigai / Nation Media Group

Young men have always preferred casual relationships, and these days so do the girls. Both genders aiming to keep their career options open for as long as possible. They also argue that casual intimacy’s more fun. But they couldn’t be more wrong.

Because while casual relationships may mean more partners, committed couples have far better sex and more of it.

Making love with a new partner is always exciting, of course, but committed couples learn far more about each other and take their lovemaking skills to a whole new level so that their intimacy is deeper and more meaningful. But even they often struggle with who should get things started!

It almost always ends up being the guy because a majority of women think it’s not feminine to take the initiative.

But most would really like to. And will if their partner creates an environment where she feels it’s safe to let go.

That starts long before anyone gets naked. So tease your wife a little over breakfast, and send her a few sexy texts during the day so that by the time you’re both home in the evening, she’ll be in the mood.

Make a habit of always relaxing a little together as your evening starts. Just chatting about your day over a cup of tea for a few minutes, and you’re halfway there. Consciously save anything contentious for another time.

You’ll encourage your wife to take the lead if you respond positively whenever she makes even the smallest move in that direction. Then she’ll do more next time. Initially, she’ll be nervous, so avoid even the slightest hint of criticism. And make intimacy a priority, because it’s a lot easier for her to take the lead if lovemaking’s already a regular part of your lives.

She wants to feel good in bed, and if she does, she’ll want more. So if you haven’t figured out what she likes yet, ask her! But not when you’re between the sheets. That way, she won’t feel pressured.

There’s a few more things that every husband should do that will help.

Like always being well dressed, because wearing nice clothes shows that you value her. Take her out to places where couples go, because watching other happy couples together will make her glad that she’s also in a relationship. Look her in the eye when she speaks and laugh at her jokes. She’ll feel valued, and you’ll both feel more aroused.

If she’s busy at home, take over a few of her tasks, like helping with the kids. Create a positive atmosphere around everything you do at home. Compliment the little things she does for you. Enthusiastically support her in her interests. Remember, above all, that being desired is the ultimate love potion. So make sure she always knows how much you adore her. And then she’ll not only become a truly passionate lover but will take the initiative just as often as you do.