Unresolved trauma turns molested men into perpetrators

Unresolved trauma among victims of sexual violence is emerging to be a lurking danger threatening the strive to end the undignifying vice in Kenya.

Terribly so, sexual violence is prevalent in both formal and informal institutions.

For instance, this year, 121 boys below 11 years and 87 boys between 12 to 17 years were reported to be sexually abused in Nairobi, according to Kenya Health Information System (KHIS) data.

Further, a 2022 World Association of Newspapers and News Publishers (Wan-Ifra) Women in News and City University of London study on sexual harassment in newsrooms, found 12 per cent of men have suffered either verbal or physical sexual harassment or both.

Generally, in Kenya, gender-based violence (GBV) lifetime prevalence for men is 20.9 per cent based on the National Crime Research Centre, meaning men and boys are equally vulnerable to abuse.

Sadly, they turn into perpetrators when they don’t receive therapy to heal from the trauma caused by their perpetrators.

During a live show on a local TV station discussing ways to combat GBV, Childline Kenya executive director Martha Sunda, said they have established a pattern of child sexual abuse in which men previously molested top the list of perpetrators.

“What we have established is that many of the perpetrators of violence against children are actually survivors of violence themselves but their traumatic experiences were not dealt with when they needed to be dealt with,” she said on December 1.

“So they have grown with it (and) now (that) they are in a position of authority or responsibility…they don't know how better to treat these children that they are responsible for. So it becomes a vicious cycle.”

Walking bombs

In an earlier interview with Getter Wasilwa, a clinical psychologist attached to the gender-based violence recovery centre at Kenyatta National Hospital, she said having hundreds of abused victims whose wounds are covered and not healed, is like living in a nation of ‘walking bombs.’

“I want people to know that rape, defilement or sodomy is the worst thing to do to a girl, woman, boy or man. It is like killing them over and over again,” she said in a drawn face.

She added: “It is disastrous for a GBV survivor to get all other treatment and not psychosocial support,” because they develop serious complications later in life.

“Some become perpetrators. They want to pass the same bitterness to somebody else. If it’s a man, he becomes a rapist. If she is a woman, she becomes a rapist too,” she said.

“They also become criminals. Others end up committing suicide. There are others who hate men and so they remain single for life.”

She gave an example of a 42-year-old woman who had sought psychosocial support at the facility. She had been defiled when she was 10, but the pain was still fresh and all she needed was an outlet to transfer what was consuming her. She had become a gangster as it offered her that opportunity.

“Some people have become mad. They are picking papers on the streets yet we don't realise this is a result of rape or defilement,” she said

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