Life hacks for new mums

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What you need to know:

  • We always question our ability to raise our children.  
  • Mothers need to have a good relationship with their infant's paediatrician.
  • It's important to surround yourself with positive people.

New mums are often victims of unsolicited parenting advice. Everybody, even the watchman at the gate, has some advice for you about colic, baby weight, diet, you name it. 
The old saying "babies aren't born with instruction manuals" has opened the door for all and sundry to come with their own instructions. Everybody’s an expert, except you, of course. 
A new mother's insecurities end up getting the best of her. In all honesty, this happens to all mothers; not just the "new" ones. We always question our ability to raise our children. 
It is human nature to fear making the wrong choices, because you want the best for your children. Therefore, when someone offers advice or guidance, we often take their prompts as criticism. 

Open your mind


Open your mind to their insights; ignore the little voice inside your head that says they're judging you. In most instances, these same people have been giving you "unwanted" advice for years and you have never paid any attention to it. 
The insecurities of having a new-born often at times rationales defensive behaviours, when faced with unwanted advice. However, motherhood is a learning experience; it starts during delivery and never ends. Listening to family and friends that have walked in your shoes before can, be a soothing and rewarding experience.

The trust you put into your child's doctor will help fight off insecurities that you may have. 

Everyone will have opinions on certain circumstances and if you listen closely, even theirs will differ from one another. Soon enough, you will find yourself surrendering like General Lee. 
However, by educating yourself on what the actual "experts" say, can eliminate the frustration and the insecurities that a new mom will face. Educating yourself on the best choices to make for your new-born, can build self-confidence, self-respect, and sanity.

Light-hearted advice 

Mothers need to have a good relationship with their infant's paediatrician, as well. Frequently, the trust you put into your child's doctor will help fight off those insecurities that you may have. 

Often, a paediatrician sees most infants during the first few months of their lives. These visits to the paediatrician hold great opportunities for mothers to ask questions. A notebook comes in handy when you need to write down concerns or questions that you have for the doctor.

Light-hearted advice is meant to be taken as helpful hints and suggestions. However, in some instances, you will have family and friends insisting on "their way" of doing things. 
When this circumstance occurs, be prepared. Thank the person and tell them you will consider their advice, quote what you have read from child-rearing books, explain to them that your child's paediatrician and you have discussed the matter and you are following the doctors’ orders. If that fails, change the subject or leave the room.

In many circumstances, especially those that are short-term, you may consider following the person's advice while they are present. Eventually, they will leave and when they do, so can their advice.
Short-term circumstances have no long-term effects. They won't warp or change the big picture. If your mother-in-law comes to your house to "help", and suggests adding more blankets to the crib or turning the heat up because the baby looks cold, just go with it. When she does leave, you can quickly undo the heartfelt actions.

It's important to surround yourself with positive people. If possible, find other mothers who share your views and values. Then, swap stories, not advice.

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