The art of raising millennial children

Welcome to the millennial world, a generation that has learnt to disrupt all systems be it in their workplaces, their learning environment, or even at home.

You’ve probably heard them speak up to their bosses negotiating their terms or working environment. You might have seen them speak of their disregard of some parenting rules or have heard them share their ideas that you might not have thought of before.

One thing is for sure, this generation is not afraid of speaking up and being heard, and when this does not happen, they are comfortable speaking in their own spaces in person or even social media which is their thing.

WHO ARE MILLENIALS?

Millennials also known as Generation Y are the demographic cohort following Generation X and preceding Generation Z.  Researchers and popular media use the early 1980’s as starting birth years and the mid 90’s to early 2000’s as ending birth years.

CHARACTERISTICS

According to Paps Wanyugi, a certified life coach, psychologist and a Millenials mentor in Nairobi, their characteristics vary by region and individuality. They are however influenced by the social economic conditions and are mostly marked by their prowess in the use of digital technologies and social media.

PARENTING

According to the psychologist, millennials are the most permissive generation of parents in Africa.

 “Most of them are busy professionals with limited time with their children and therefore prefer doing it the diplomatic way. The outcome will be either confident and self-aware kids or under-parented and neglected children based on their complementary parenting style,” she says.

For older parents, this generation has been a challenge. Millenials are known to delay or rather refuse to buy into total adult hood.

PARENTING MILLENNIALS

It is important to understand this generation to know what they need.

“They want practical, actionable and relevant solutions to things. Parents should therefore learn not to compare them and should encourage them in their own paths.”

“Millenials are innovative and creative. They want to design their own lives and be their own boss. Most of them are aspiring entrepreneurs, who want to make big money even from working twice a week and having fun the rest of the days.” she notes, adding that they are very dynamic and versatile.

“They easily get bored with opportunities that are not stimulating and adventurous and job security is the least of their concerns. They chase after fulfillment and progress in life and parents should support them in following their dreams which show from an early age.”

According to the life coach, their lives are mostly on their gadgets and parents need to be careful so as not to miss out on what they really need – to be seen, heard, validated and deeply connected.

“Family contracts are a way out, especially in household where parents are equally addicted and therefore lack moral authority to sanction their kids screen time. Due to their screen time overload, staggering ambitions and frustrating environments, they are the most emotional and sometimes irrational generation. They are in dire need of mental health support. Sign them up with life coaches, therapists and mentors for support and empathy,” the coach advices.

DOS OR DON’TS IN SUPPORTING MILLENIALS

“Even as you install that Wifi in your home, instill values at early age. Guide them in defining who they are and what they stand for before they leave home. Teach them to conquer themselves before their lofty attempt to conquer the world,” the psychologist further advices.

 “Don’t advise them before you understand them. They are mostly opinionated individuals who respect reasoning more than being told. Listen. Listen. Listen,” she emphasises.

The coach, also a mother of two points out the importance of involving millennial children in decision making.

“Be sure to involve them in decisions that affect them and let them share their opinions. They value democratic leadership and are an amazing support system when they feel respected and involved.”

The coach advices parents to be there for their children and to support their ambitions.

 “Support their dreams even when you’re not sure how they will pan out. Let them know that you believe in them and will be there for them. They always figure out and especially when they have a strong support system. Be an unconditional love, offer wisdom and be a positive presence in their lives. Parenting role remains constant in all revolutions in all generations. It is this nurturing that will keep the future generations human,” she concludes.