What you need to know:
- Recently, I noticed that shortly after a disagreement with someone, I started to experience neck and shoulder pain
- When the disagreement was resolved, most of the pain subsided
As we get older, many of us think of physical pain as a given. It’s normal and something to be endured. But in my line of work, I don’t think that has to be true. In fact, what I believe is that we make ourselves sick.
Very often, we are unable to process our emotions and, as a result, we store them in our body. Recently, I noticed that shortly after a disagreement with someone, I started to experience neck and shoulder pain. When the disagreement was resolved, most of the pain subsided, but some did remain – most likely because I hadn’t fully digested all my feelings around the situation.
It was quite upsetting when I first had the realisation. I suddenly couldn’t blame anyone for my woes. But it was also tremendously empowering: if I had made myself sick, I, and only I, had the ability to put myself back together again.
This is exactly what I explained to Nadia when she came to see me. A court case around a contested family inheritance had left her overweight, stiff and in almost-constant pain. I don’t think she appreciated my initial analysis. She, like many before her, was looking for a quick fix, a magic pill to make all her troubles go away. Unfortunately, this is not something I could give her.
Yes, with supplements like magnesium, fish oils and B-vitamins, I could help to alleviate the pain. Yes, with dietary changes (less sugar which promotes inflammation, three meals a day which regulates appetite, and lots of water which really is the elixir of life), she had the tools to start her journey to lose weight. And yes, with a few regular walks, she could get some fresh air to calm her mind. But all this meant work. She had to be disciplined enough to engage in these activities every day. If she did not, it would be like being on an escalator moving backwards. She always had to keep moving forward.
So once we tackle the physical side of things, addressing the mental aspect is paramount. At some point, we all have to decide whether we want to choose health or whether we want to stay loyal to our suffering.
So once her body started to feel better and Nadia was getting the much-needed rest that she deserved, she started to have the uncomfortable conversations that she needed to have with the people in her life. And she, like me, would find pain arising, only when residual emotion remained.
So it’s a process that one embarks upon, one day at a time, and I promise you, you can be pain-free.
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