How athlete talk masks the real talk

I was well into my third year of sports reporting when I began finding post-match interviews boring and predictable. 

In the end, I concluded that athletes come from a common gene pool whose members say the exact same things whenever faced by a reporter.

And then last year, I found out that this phenomenon has a name. Athlete talk, is what popular American writer and TV producer Shonda Rhimes calls it in her book Year of Yes.

She describes it as, “What happens on all those interviews that take place right after any sports game, when the athlete goes before the press and keeps a smile on her face, voice bland and pleasant as she deftly fields questions, never once saying anything of controversy or substance.” 

If you ask me, Kenyan track and field athletes are the greatest athlete talkers.

Almost all of them can stand beside the tape after breaking a world record, sweat pouring down their bodies, panting heavily, towering over some awestruck reporter, and say smiling: “I am just happy I made my country proud. It is good to see my hard work paid off. My focus now shifts to the next race….yada yada yada.” Same empty statements each time.

But it isn’t just top athletes. Local sports administrators are also big athlete talkers.

Earlier this week, Football Kenya Federation announced that coach David Ouma was no longer the national women’s team coach.

But why his abrupt departure? Well, the agreement was made “on mutual consent.”

How tired those three words are! I long lost count of the number of times I’ve heard them. In fact, I can’t remember the last time a coach or player was axed from the team without “mutual consent.”

Anybody with average knowledge in local sports knows that those words are just codes for “We have sacked him,” yet the phrase just won’t fall out of fashion.  I’m not saying that the farewell between Ouma and FKF couldn’t have been mutual.

Having known him for about nine years, first as an acquaintance, then a neighbour, then a friend and valuable source, I can say unequivocally that “Oush” is one of the most uncontroversial individuals I know. He has this cool countenance that is impossible to hate, and lives by very strong Christian values.

Which is why the “mutual consent” issue only opens the door for speculation. What could have led to his sacking? Did Migne, Kimanzi and all those others really leave “on mutual consent?” It means that this autopilot answer has nothing to do with the truth.

It has to do with keeping the door to possible questions shut. Reaching one arm out to hand out crumbs of information, then closing the door again.

Here’s an alternative to the boring athlete talk:  

Athlete Talk: “We parted ways on mutual consent.” Authentic Talk: “That was a really tough decision to make. XY has been a pillar in the team, but we missed key cues along the way, especially with regards to his team selection, which led to fragmentation within the playing unit.

“His departure is bittersweet, but we must look closely at the ways he came up short so that we can learn and grow from this.”

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