Depression: How love and care pulled me back from dark hole

Depressed man

Accept and love yourself as you are. Get closer to God. Focus on people who lift you up. Avoid being alone or idle.

Photo credit: Pool

What you need to know:

  • I have been battling depression for some time, and am on various treatments and therapies.
  • My troubles started at puberty. I rushed into relationships, leading to a series of heartbreaks.

I’m a normal young person, like any other out there, but I feel I have gone through quite a lot in my short life.

I have been battling depression for some time, and am on various treatments and therapies.

Many young people are silently suffering from depression and, maybe by sharing my experience, a life may be saved.

A boy’s dream is to follow in his father’s footsteps. But, when I was four, my dad abandoned me and that created a void in my life.

I have grown by my mother’s love and witnessed her struggles, especially fending for me and my siblings. On many occasions, she has pushed herself to the edge to ensure we are comfortable. My troubles started at puberty. I rushed into relationships, leading to a series of heartbreaks.

Then I lost two of my siblings in quick succession. Their deaths left me hollow and I felt life had lost meaning. I was in these low moments when I started abusing drugs in the hope of lessening the pain. I was wrong.

Drug addiction

I struggled with addiction. One day, I went home drunk and locked myself up in a room. I wanted to commit suicide, but instead blacked out. My mother climbed through a tiny window to check if I was dead or alive.

I was later taken to a psychologist who referred me to a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with bipolar 1 manic episode — a complication that brings about memory loss, poor judgement, over-exhilaration, hallucination, elevated moods among others.

I was given some prescriptions and put on the therapy. I would like to have a word with those who are going through mental challenges like mine or even worse. Despair is not an option. A problem shared is a problem half solved. Find a listening ear. 

Accept and love yourself as you are. Get closer to God. Focus on people who lift you up. Avoid being alone or idle. Exercise and eat right. To the society and families, provide depressed people with positive reinforcement.

We often judge ourselves too harshly and suffer very low self-esteem occasionally.

Always remind mental patients of the things you admire and love about them.

As narrated to Jackson Ngari.

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