I faked pregnancy because he wanted a child and he is mad that I lied

My boyfriend wanted to have a child with me. We are college students at different institutions. I acted as if I had agreed, and when I later told him I was pregnant, he was very proud and happy. A month ago he realised that I wasn't pregnant, and I had lied to him. I had faked a pregnancy test, so he believed. Once he realised I had lied he now wants to break up with me and I'm afraid of losing him. Please advise me. 

Morine

READERS ADVICE

As it is always said, "Choices have consequences." You chose to lie, so it goes that you will reap what you sowed. Since it has already happened, you have an obligation of explaining to him and convincing him as to why you chose to lie to him. If he is satisfied with your explanation you shall continue your relationship. 

Rev Geoffrey Avudiko, Botwa,Kitale

Does he pay for your college and upkeep? Has he declared his commitment? Can you take care of this baby without any support? Studies and pregnancy do not go together. With pregnancy comes fatigue, pregnancy brain, clumsiness, mood swings and, morning sickness, which I don't think you are prepared for. Concentrate on your studies first. 

Miriam Mereng

I suggest that you complete your studies and forget about that man. He doesn't know how complicated it is to study and nurse a young baby at the same time. 

Ronnie Euko

Stop focusing on things that are not important at the moment. This man will not even marry you. He will look for a woman who is more focused on her life and use you as a bad example.

Wangui Njeri

Are you a baby-making machine? Does he have a plan for how he will support the baby? Medical bills during birth? Does he have a job? Do you have a job? What is his rush if he is still in college? Nobody needs to tell you this is a guy you shouldn't be messing around with. If you wrote about your issue to a newspaper you already know he isn't the one for you. Both of you need to move on. What exactly does he want from you? As a woman, you need to understand there is so much to you than baby-making.

Chaki Gloria

I advise you to have an education first. The so-called boyfriend doesn't want to see your progress, that's the truth of the matter. You need to wake up.

Lyann Bierbier

EXPERT'S TAKE

He may want you to have his baby but you have to consider that you are both still studying. That should be your priority as an individual. There are financial implications that come with having a baby and this does affect your studies and future. What if he changes his mind as he furthers his future? You both need to be in a position of independence in case things do not go as planned. If you have to be pregnant to please him then that is not a healthy relationship. For now, concentrate on yourself. If he genuinely has feelings for you he will respect that and you can revisit once you have acquired a firmer grounding that affords such responsibility.

Maurice Matheka, Relationship counselor

NEXT WEEK'S DILEMMA

I am a guy who is 29, and I have been dating a girl for five years. I recently learnt of my girlfriend's past relationships which she mentioned during a deep conversation. She had never disclosed her past. In the past, she had said she had only been in one relationship, for which she kept on insisting on telling me. In our deep conversation, I learnt she had three exes. The issue has bothered me. I am wondering what other things she has been lying about. I planned to marry this girl but I am not sure anymore. She is a kind and caring person but am not sure if I want to settle down with someone who can lie and be convincing while at it. I feel disrespected and made a fool of. What more has she been hiding and lying about?

Davy

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