What you need to know:
- Premature ejaculation, the uncontrollable action that leaves both the man and woman hanging, can start from the time one becomes sexually active and can be lifelong unless treated.
I first met Jerry three years ago. He was in his third month of marriage, and there was a problem. His wife would not accompany him to the clinic, despite my clinic placing calls.
"The problem is that I have not been able to consummate the marriage," Jerry explained, "the moment she touches me I go off."
Jerry took all manner of medicine and concoctions and nothing worked.
"I have used the blue pill to no avail," he explained, "herbalists have given multiple concoctions, some very bitter but nothing has worked; are you able to help me?"
His wife got fed up and decided to leave.
I did a medical evaluation on Jerry and diagnosed him with severe premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation, the uncontrollable action that leaves both the man and woman hanging, can start from the time one becomes sexually active and can be lifelong unless treated. This type of premature ejaculation is described as primary in nature. It is an inherent abnormality in sexual response and requires medical treatment to resolve.
The secondary type of premature ejaculation is one that comes at some point in life. In this case, one has been functioning pretty well then somewhere along the way the problem begins. In many cases, the person has a medical or psychological problem and premature ejaculation is a symptom of the hidden problem.
Then there are relationships where the woman may take too long to reach orgasm or to be satisfied or where the man has normal ejaculatory time but would have loved to stay longer. Such people also complain of premature ejaculation but in the real sense do not have it. Their treatment involves evaluation of the intimacy process and supporting them to reach mutual satisfaction through therapy.
Jerry is back at my clinic, three years later.
"Did your wife ever come back?" I ask.
"Nope! She kept her word," Jerry lamented. He suffered embarrassment since his sexual condition was discussed widely in the family. He finally pulled himself together and, with a commitment to have a family, had moved on and started a new relationship.
"I have explained everything to my new girlfriend, we have agreed that we will work on my problem together and we will need your help," he explained. They already had a date set for the traditional wedding and he wanted to start on treatment before the event. I reevaluated his medical condition once more. Three years had been a long time and things could have changed. I reconfirmed his diagnosis of severe primary premature ejaculation and put him on treatment.
Four months later Jerry walked into the clinic with Alice, his new wife. It was my first time meeting her.
"First things first," he blurted out, "our sex lives have been fantastic and we let the premature ejaculation story lie in the annals of history, I got well. My wife is pregnant," he beamed.