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Learn the art of ending conversations gracefully

conversation

Many people struggle to bring conversations to a graceful end.

Photo credit: Samuel Muigai | Nation Media Group

When escaping someone really dull, offer a vague future connection to end on a positive note ‘We must have a coffee sometime.’ Which of course you never will

Do you find ending conversations difficult, especially with people you don’t know very well? You’re not alone. Many people struggle to bring conversations to a graceful end. Maybe you feel embarrassed or your closing words fall flat, But all things come to an end, and your partner doesn’t want to go on talking forever either! Especially after the initial enthusiasm’s faded.

So the moment you reach that point you should start thinking about bringing things to a conclusion.

A good conversation exit can be quite basic. Smile. Express pleasure and gratitude. ‘It was nice meeting you.’ Make a clear ending phrase. ‘I need to go now.’ It’s nice to soften that with a ‘pre-leaving’ signal. Something like ‘One last thing I wanted to mention before I go is…’

When escaping someone really dull, offer a vague future connection to end on a positive note ‘We must have a coffee sometime.’ Which of course you never will.

But if it’s someone you’d genuinely like to talk to again, then say so as part of your exit. ‘I enjoyed talking with you. Could I have your number, and we talk again later?’ Or ‘Hey, I’ve got to go, but maybe we could meet up next week for lunch?’

Social media accounts

At a networking event you could exchange social media accounts: ‘I’d love to keep in touch! Do you have a LinkedIn account?’ Or introduce them to someone else ‘Have you met …? Let me introduce you.’ Or ‘I’m just going to grab a drink, can I bring you one?” Most times they’ll say no, but if they don’t, fetch them one, say ‘it was nice meeting you!’ and turn away!

If a colleague’s dragging their heels at the water cooler, walk them to their desk or claim you need to go visit someone. Plan lunch together if you genuinely want to extend your conversation. Or offer an email: ’I’ll get those answers for you. Expect an email later on today!’ Briefly mention a highlight of the conversation as you close to make your colleague feel heard and appreciated.

End a video call with something like: ‘It looks like we’ve finished everything on the agenda. Thanks for the call!’ Or create a deadline ‘I’ve got another phone call in five minutes. It’s been great talking with you!’ Or ‘That’s all I have today.’ Ask if everyone else is done, and exit. Or a little softer ‘I need to head out, but you all carry on.’

Sometimes someone just won’t get the hint, either because they’re dominating or won’t let you go, or because they’re lonely and hate to lose a listening ear. Be firm, and tell them again that you’ve run out of time. If they just keep talking, interrupt and say something like ‘I really do have to go. Talk to you later!’

Exiting a conversation doesn’t have to be hard. Give a reason, express appreciation, make a positive remark, and (optionally!) exchange contacts for a future meeting.