What you need to know:
- I should have been “returned” to church last Sunday but the Apostle was away.
- Last Wednesday, after his return, Apostle Elkana officially “returned” my family to church.
Having not been in school for some time, I returned last Wednesday. I would have returned earlier but for Apostle Reverend Elkana, the Principal Reverend Spiritual Superintendent of The Holiest of All Ghosts (THOAG) Tabernacle Assembly, who has asked me to wait.
“The people of Mwisho wa Lami have so many outdated traditions to follow after bereavement,” he said. “This is 2021; we can’t be following such old rituals like shaving your head clean, which makes no sense at all.”
I agreed with him, only to realise his church, too, had a litany of rituals to be followed.
“We need to ‘return’ you to church officially, before you can be allowed to visit any other home, or go back to work,” he said.
I reminded him that Fiolina, Ford and Pius had all returned to work.
“Usijiweke kwa hao. You don’t know what they have done to cleanse themselves,” he said.
There were other Christian rituals to be done, but I did not have to go through all of them. Apostle would fix them for me — at a fee!
I should have been “returned” to church last Sunday but the Apostle was away. I would have had to wait until today but the Apostle said that as a special member of the church, he could organise something for me even on a weekday.
So, last Wednesday, after his return, Apostle Elkana officially “returned” my family to church. My family consisted of only Branton and I, for Fiolina was away in Kakamega with everyone else.
The church choir picked us from home, and after a special Mass dedicated to us, returned us after services. As a way of appreciation, I gave good sadaka to the church. My sister Caro prepared a great meal for them.
(I am not saying that you should go telling everyone, but I suspect Caro’s marriage could be experiencing what the Jubilee Party is experiencing. Her husband did not even come for the funeral, and Caro has been behaving as if she will stay here for long. She has already settled in my former house at my dad’s compound, and also enrolled her children at Mwisho wa Lami Primary. But as I said, don’t tell anyone.)
Anyway, before the pastor left, he asked to pray for Fiolina. He wanted to pray to her in person, yet he was aware she was away in Kakamega.
He asked me to bring one of her dresses and place it on a chair so that he could pray. For good measure, we placed her shoes and bag, and the Apostle prayed for her. This special prayer, of course, came at an extra cost.
“The spirit tells me some people are fighting you and your wife at work. But I will fast so that we overcome,” he said.
He also promised to bring me some anointing oil that we should apply on ourselves: “Even at your school, someone is busy fighting you. But when you report back, do not fight back. Let the Lord, through me, fight the battle for you and your wife.”
The Apostle was right. When I arrived at school on Thursday, the school felt different. I couldn’t tell what the issue was, but clearly something was different.
With nothing to do, I decided to go to Class Eight and hammer down some Swahili ngeli. When I left the class for the staffroom, at 8.07am, I found a staff meeting just starting. Kuya was chairing.
“On behalf of Mwisho wa Lami Primary community, pole sana Dre, and welcome back,” he said.
“As you know, the school had to continue, and since you did not say when you would return, or if you will return, the HM asked me to steer the school, and I will continue to do so until otherwise advised. Let us look at the timetable; did I hear anyone say there is a problem?”
A few teachers, mainly Mrs Atika, Lena, her bad hair in tow, Madam Anita and Madam Ruth complained, saying that the timetable did not favour them.
“You have given me 8am and 3pm classes four out of the five days. Surely,” Madam Ruth told him off.
Mrs Atika asked to speak too: “I am not sure it is right for us to be arguing about the timetable instead of us taking time to say pole to Dre who has just returned.
Kuya stopped her.
“As the interim head of the school, I offered condolences to Dre on behalf of everyone,” said Kuya. “If anyone wants to do more, that’s your personal decision and you can do it outside this.”
To defuse tension, and recalling what Apostle had said, I agreed with Kuya, and asked everyone to focus on school matters. Even Kuya was surprised.
Later that day, at lunch time, Mrs Atika, Lena and Madam Anita asked to see me. They told me pole and gave me an envelope that had contributions from the teachers.
Apostle came to see me as soon as I got home, to find out how my first day had been. I used the money the teachers had given me to pay for anointing oil which Apostle Elkana promised me would deal with Kuya.
He told me to stay calm, not to fight back, and to be guided by Exodus 14:14: “The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”