Tale-tell signs you are dating a criminal

Few women will knowingly start a relationship with a thug. Signs that a man is a criminal are subtle and by the time you find out his true character, you’re either his victim or under police investigations for aiding a crime or hiding a criminal. But there are always signs that a chivalrous gentleman is a wolf in sheep’s skin.

Types of criminals: Dr. Scott Bonn, a criminology expert and the author of Why We Love Serial Killers says a man might become a criminal due to two factors. “He might be a criminal by sociopathy. This means his crimes will be inspired, learned, and nurtured by the environment around him,” she says. Also, he could be a criminal by psychopathy. “His crimes will be more mental, and related to the underdevelopment of his ability to control his mental impulses and emotions,” Dr. Scott says.

His appearance: That he is a criminal will be written all over his appearance. Satoshi Kanazwa, the author of The Intelligence Paradox says sub-consciously, a nice guy will look and feel nice while a nasty man will feel and look nasty. Trust your instincts. “We all have innate psychological mechanisms to tell a nice and nasty person apart, only that these are overlooked in favour of the thrill the nasty presents,” he says. “A criminal will try as much as possible to disguise his appearance in order to get as close and intimate with a woman as possible,” he says.

Criminal perception: Dr. Stanton Samenow, the author of Inside the Criminal Mind says you can tell if a man you recently started to date is a criminal by listening to his perceptions and judgment of other crimes. “A criminal will tend to express outrage at a crime they believe they could never commit. Similarly, they will show a level of acceptability or leniency on a crime they think they can commit,” he says. Despite the consequences of a grievous crime, a criminal will tend to say its reward, such as revenge or money, is worthier than the punishment such as a prison sentence.

The criminal’s woman: “He will go for the insecure and emotionally needy woman. He will sweep her off her feet with elaborate gestures of charm, romance and excitement,” says Dr. Samenow. Also, a criminal may go for a woman who is a thrill seeker. “This type of woman will have almost the same characteristics that he has. She will be a thrill seeker and controlling, and will lead the high and fast life,” says Dr. Samenow. In instances where the woman discovers she has fallen in love with a criminal, it is possible she will continue with the relationship instead of walking away. “Such a woman will continue with the unhealthy and dangerous relationship because of self-blame. She will also fear what might happen to her if she leaves, think that she cannot get a better man, or succumb to social pressure and defensively opt to stand by the illusions a criminal has fed her about his innocence,” says Dr. Samenow.

His crimes: The biggest mistake you can make is to assume a criminal can only commit murder. There are no limitations to what a criminal can do or cannot do. “Men who commit one type of crime are more likely to commit other types of crimes. There are no men who are only murderers or men who are only thieves,” he says.

Age factor: According to Steven E. Barkan, a professor of sociology and the author of A Primer on Social Problems you’re more likely to date a criminal if he’s under 30 years. Apparently, the highest percentages of violent crimes are usually committed by males under the age of 30. “The older a man gets, the less likely he is to engage in criminal behavior,” he says. His sentiments are echoed by Dr. Chris Hart who says male criminals are also likely to be unmarried. “Married men usually have more to lose, especially as they get older,” he says. “Once they become husbands and fathers, men gradually settle down.” If a man is successful, he is less likely to engage in criminal behavior. Apparently, says Dr. Hart, access to women usually drives male competition. “Successful men who have several girlfriends deprive other men of opportunities to become fathers.” Such men must compete for the attention of women, especially where they realise they may fail, and this includes practicing and concealing criminal tendencies in order to climb up the social ladder.