5 ways a teenager can build self-esteem

sad teenager
Learning how to boost your self-esteem will help you find a better sense of worth and value. It is the key to feeling good about yourself.

What you need to know:

  • Have compassion for yourself
  • Find a hobby
  • Learn to say No
  • Affirm yourself
  • Surround yourself with positive people

Teens need to have a healthy self-image to succeed. If you are struggling with low self-esteem, it can be hard to focus on your studies and develop social skills. You need to have a good self-esteem as it can significantly impact your mental and physical health as well as success in future.

What is self-esteem?

It is a person's overall sense of self-worth or self-value: the opinion that one holds of oneself, regardless of any comparison to others. Self-esteem has everything to do with how you feel about yourself and how you think about yourself.

There are two primary sources of self-esteem:

  1. Internal: This includes memories of things that happened in the past: they may not be as precise or intense but still affect you. Your evaluations, including thoughts and opinions about yourself, appear in your direct conscious experience.
  2. External: Information from the outside world, such as whether your friends show love for you or if society values who you are can affect how you feel about yourself.

Triggers of low self-esteem

  • Negative friends who don't support them emotionally 
  • Stressful life events such as unstable families also lower a child's mood.
  • Teenagers performing poorly at school can develop mood disorders like depression and loneliness.
  • Bullying or struggling with ongoing medical issues.
  • Too much internet use or social media could also lead to low self-esteem in teens. (Teens are exposed to a world where they don't need to work hard and get instant gratification from having followers on Instagram or likes on Facebook. This teaches them that it's okay not to try hard, which could decrease their drive to succeed in other areas of their life.)

Trauma or abuse often harms a teen's self-belief system and this can haunt them for years.

Signs of a depressed teenager

  • They feel like they're not good enough
  • They have difficulty making friends or getting along with others, especially authority figures
  • They avoid opportunities to try new things
  • Their grades start slipping
  • They experience chronic anxiety and worry about things that might happen to them in the future.

Unfortunately, these worries don't go away unless you recognise the signs and try to address them either individually or with the help of a parent(s)/ professional. Below are some steps you can take to boost your self esteem:

1. Self-compassion

This is where you practice being kind to yourself, just as you would with a struggling friend. If someone close to you were feeling down because they had their heart broken or didn't do well on an exam, what words of encouragement would get them through it? Well, then those are the exact words that will get yourself back up on your feet.

2. Find a hobby

Self-esteem is about being your best self and doing what you're passionate about. When you focus on something that you love to do, it can be one of the most fulfilling experiences in life. It doesn't matter if those passions are exploring new cities or just getting better at art. As long as you have an outlet for your energy, you will feel better about yourself.

Learn to overcome procrastination and boredom by doing things that you enjoy. Find hobbies like crafting or cooking as an outlet for creativity and relaxation. Engage in activities where you can use your mind, such as reading a book or playing chess.

3. Learn to say No 

Learning to say no can be one of the most freeing and empowering skills a teen learns. First, it teaches you that there's such a thing as too much work or responsibility, which is just something adults have to deal with all the time. Second, you will develop your sense of what you can do instead of feeling like you need to do something to please others.

4. Affirm yourself

Positive affirmations are phrases or words that you say to yourself when your self-esteem is low. They can be anything from telling yourself, "I'm going to do my best." For example, if you're feeling anxious about an upcoming exam, remind yourself of all the things you've accomplished in life thus far so that you remember what a success you've made of yourself up to this point.

5. Positive circle 

It's easier to have strong self-esteem when you're around people who make you feel good about yourself. Spending time with friends and family members can help you regain your sense of worth. Feeling good about yourself and confident in your abilities can be achieved when you have positive interactions with friends.

Start your journey towards self-worth

Building confidence in yourself will help you in many areas, such as looking for jobs or succeeding in college. Learning how to boost your self-esteem will help you find a better sense of worth and value. It is the key to feeling good about yourself. Speak up about what is bothering you and seek help from someone you can trust. Trust the process.