This is what adulting is all about…

Children imagine that being an adult will be wonderful. As teens, they smugly think they know everything, and that their parents got it all wrong.

Adults know different of course, but no teenager ever gets it. What else don’t they know about adulting?

They don’t know how important it is to make good choices early on, in their education, career and relationships. And that empathy, resilience and motivation are critical skills.

They don’t realise how much their outgoings and responsibilities will be as an adult. Or that they’ll be constantly worrying about money.

They don’t realise how hard they will have to work. Or how easy it is to make friends when you’re young and how much more difficult it is as you grow older.

They don’t realise that life throws some really tough curveballs, and that they’ll have to deal with them on their own. Because no one really cares, and everyone has their own problems to solve. 

They don’t know how important it is to look after their health. And that all the abuse they’re heaping on their bodies now will eventually catch up with them.

They can’t even begin to understand how destructive alcohol, casual sex and drugs can be.

They don’t realise how jealous people can be, so that even your best friend might become your worst enemy.

They don’t know that you’re always judged by your looks, no matter how talented or intelligent you are. That it’s not about what you’ve done, but what you’re doing now that matters. Or how fleeting most of our feelings are, so you need to take yourself much less seriously.

They don’t realise how much they have to learn. Or that everyone is the sum of all the choices they’ve made.

Teens have no idea how important it is to learn to deal well with conflict, disappointments, hardships and sorrows.

Or how destructive divorce is, so it’s critical to choose the right person to marry. That marrying someone just for their beauty or wealth is a really bad idea. And that relationships get better as you learn to appreciate the value of kindness and compassion.

They don’t realise how costly mistakes are, how quickly you have to learn from each one, and how repeating the same mistake again could ruin your life.

They don’t realise how slowly time goes by when you’re young, and how fast it goes as an adult. Until one day you realise that you’ve only a limited time left to live. They don’t realise that the money they’re blowing now could be really important in the future.

They don’t realise how many people are competing to impress people they don’t know with money they don’t have. And that life isn’t actually about who makes the most. It’s about who can find the most joy with the life they have.

Bottom line? Adulting is like losing your mother in the supermarket for the rest of your life.